Tuesday, November 9, 2010


Time is short, and so is life. So make the most of it.

I woke up around 9am today, and then I pushed away my mobile phone as the alarm clock went off. The first thought that I pondered to myself was this: I only have 6 hours between now and when I leave to go counselling. That is a limited window in which I must do all my scheduled tasks. The schedule is a barrier, a barrier that gives me something to do. A barrier that prevents me from thinking: thinking that the world is utterly futile and life is hopeless. I told myself this morning that I'll allow myself to think about that stuff only after I have finished my tasks for this morning.

The morning was slow, but I managed. I sent off an application; prepared another to completion; booked an interview; sent off an enquiry, and then of course, there is counselling later. That's 5 items in the list. I've not even searched for jobs today, and I'm completing another application right now. That could make for 7 items. 3-4 items is normally a good sign. 5-7 is normally a brilliant sign. Tomorrow starts work, I'll be doing about 7.5 hours. Compared to last week, this is a walk in the park. I just hope that I have enough change in my oyster card to survive . I'm pretty sure that I do.

After mentioning my day like this, I think it is positive. It also reminds me of the theory of spoons. I only have so many spoons in the day. I must make the most of it, I must not waste spoons on purposeless endavours as well, like alcohol, terrible television or boring people. I've set a lot for myself this week, but considering my track record its not as bad.

I suppose I ought to get on with my schedule. That application won't do itself.

I felt a bit low in the previous post, this post says that I'm fighting. I suppose that's all I can do. I can't wish that I had more spoons, but I should just scoop up the best oppurtunities and actions as possible. Applying for a job with the title 'Her Royal Magesty' in the organisation is probably something to smile at; even if I'm not a republican.

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