Tonight I've got the presidential debate on through 2 tv feeds, while leaving on stockhausen on spotify

dear diary

Then
The year is 2004. It is the start of university in my fist year. The Bush-Kerry presidential debates are on TV. The issues on my mind are the iraq war, the WMD question and how I can fit in and one day become an academic philosopher.

Now
My friend had a heart attack. I went to boxing today, I did some gym after work. I work in a national newspaper. I am currently watching sky news, waiting for the debate between Trump and Clinton (who the fuck would have expected that in 2004?).

I had a memory of my past. I keep referring to past memories from certain periods of time. Memories become like crystals, crushed into beautiful shapes as the time buries it

Its the early 2000s and my brother started gigging, he looked like the shit, and older and cooler than me.

It's the mid 2000s, bro is still gigging and a little more experienced, skilled and popular. He looked the shit and I was his cool bourgeoning brother, plus i 'could' be sexy in a few years, that kind of look.

Its the late 2000s, bro is still gigging, I think he's awesome, but I see other bands who are his warm up acts and they have a freshness and energy he used to have. I notice that the sound of bands who are getting more currency are changing a bit, although my Brother is still in the loop. His coolness begins to diminish

I have this memory as a brief vignette. I thought I might want to share it.

I miss my friend. Still no news after his heart attack. I went to the Rodizio restaurant that we always went to. I told the man about what happened to him, the waiter said he wishes him well. That rodizio place is our favourite eatery.

Dear Diary,

My best friend had a heart attack. Last week around this time on sunday evening, I was likely the last person he contacted.

Things are a bit heavy right now. My best friend had a heart attack. That's pretty fucking heavy to deal with.

Plus I have my own problems on top of it.

Dear Diary,

My 'On this Day' today has 2012 which says:

• On this Day I was at an International Paralympic Committee reception, Sir Philip Craven was there, it was an amazing day. 

I entered two this week:

Monday:

First day as Editorial Assistant at The Sentinel. I'm not a casual anymore!

Wednesday:

Updated my Linkedin: Editorial Assistant at The Sentinel (several desks) -I'm not a casual anymore!

After work today, I did the gym, after gym, I had some prawn toast from the local. I've really gotten into japanese food lately. I'm starting to feel like a normal person. 

Except for the fact that I sitll have crippling night terrors, panic attacks and a belief that I only have two weeks to live :(