I woke up around 10am. I haven't been doing very many tasks in my planned schedule, most importantly I have been avoiding my PhD application.
I've gotten an email from the Flemish funder which shocked the shit out of me. Suddenly everything in my schedule has frozen and today I am scared into freezing everything for this application.
I'm scared, I'm frightened, but I am also lazy. A part of me expects to fail. A part of me has already set in the seed of sabotage, not really thinking that this pipe dream will ever happen.
What has happened to me? Since when have I become so complacent?
It's shocking, and worse of all, I deserve the misfortune I am in.
I need to toil to improve. Today I'll make it for the PhD application (luckily the form is in english)
I've gotten an email from the Flemish funder which shocked the shit out of me. Suddenly everything in my schedule has frozen and today I am scared into freezing everything for this application.
I'm scared, I'm frightened, but I am also lazy. A part of me expects to fail. A part of me has already set in the seed of sabotage, not really thinking that this pipe dream will ever happen.
What has happened to me? Since when have I become so complacent?
It's shocking, and worse of all, I deserve the misfortune I am in.
I need to toil to improve. Today I'll make it for the PhD application (luckily the form is in english)
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