I do feel a little bit ashamed of what I did. I wasted my whole morning. Worst of all I have less time to composer. Fuck.

I am also hungry. Those chocolate buttons last night were really good. Cost £1 at the sainsburys. Soo much going on, I really didn't need that police shit. I could use some chocolate buttons, or lovely doritos. I love doritos. I had doritios last night with mayo. I'm going through some emails, to catch up, put in my shifts etc.

I've got to pull my socks up. This ain't no dress rehearsal now. I can't stop thinking about that whole incident earlier today. Its making me wonder: what is the next step? Maybe there is no next step. Maybe I'll wait a few years and then try CBT. I think that's not an option anymore. That's a shame. It's a shame to think that it was.

Onwards

(p.s. hope i dont get to see police for any time soon)