Saturday, January 11, 2014

dear diary,

i've had problems with insomnia lately.

Problems with overeating too

problems with motivation

They seem all related.

At least I don't have a masturbation problem.  I've been wanking less than once a day for the past 3-4 months...I think it's my late 20s hormones kicking in. No longer horny like a teenager.

Do I miss it?

Don't know...maybe I don't. At least I have more stuff going on.

I've had something on my mind for the past week. I made these videos at the party last week, and they filled up my tablet computer. I've spent the week freeing up space on dropbox, then uploading the vids on dropbox, then editing the vids, then uploading the vids, and now slowly deleting the vids and completing the uploads. I've completed the editing of vids.

I've done gym 5 days in a row. Hoping to make it 6 days. Need to get up early for that though. Tummy hurts a bit, am I hungry? Don't know.

Last night was watching the film 'Aliens'. That gave me a panic attack, but...maybe hat's normal for people who watch horror films...I don't know.

I've also got a new tool in my arsenal. I use a notebook. I have a notebook that I got from work. It's awesome. I am using it to make notes. I used it at the discussion group this wednesday for notes. I am using it to write down index numbers for editing vids instead of putting it on google keep. It's one way of helping me cope with processing tasks.

In other news, I chatted to a girl on okcupid...might turn into something tomorrow. This notebook is my new best friend.

In other other news. I talked to activist girl - random midnight facebook chat. I was being nice and supportive to her as she's having a hard time with depression and doing her masters. I think she'll do better than I did. I think she also is stronger and more determined than she puts herself to be. She's awesome.

I wonder if I'm a nice guy in real life. I have no idea. In my own head I am just thinking about food and farts and tasks. I'm sure people see me in a different way to how I see myself in the world.

I am going to try and sleep. Or maybe eat.


I need to do shit.

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