Sunday, February 7, 2010

The first step is the hardest (so they say)

I must set more targets for myself. The idea of using google calendar has been successful. I've probably used GCal for two years now.

I now am considering setting a very specific target: Lose one 1lb a week. I'm 225 at the moment. Next week I aim for 224.

I did a jog today and it changed my whole mood, I think all that oxygen pumping into my heart changes my energy levels and gives me a bit of a lift. I've also started some new vitamin-supplements that I found in the house. This stuff is probably useless but I'd prefer to utilise them rather than those horrid pills stay around the house. Also, I may suspect it might work.

My ex used to have homeopathy pills. She gave them to her daughter and she at them willy nilly. I miss them. I sent her a valentine's day card, and a gift. I'm chatting to a lot of girls on a certain dating site lately. I'm also participating in another social networking site. I'm the obsessive type and I should probably not do that too much; I should focus on myself. I have realised that I rarely spend time with my thoughts anymore. I hide behind TV, food, music, audiobooks and so on. In a way that was a coping strategy with some moderate success to avoid the deperssive thoughts. I feel my own voice is coming back, and I perhaps can benefit from listening to it. The problem comes if I am open to listening to my thoughts, and then Mia comes to talk to me. I'm not very good at resisting her.

Being told that I'm special and that I am wanted and being tempted into feeling that way by purging can be temptation. I must abstain from such emotional delights. I shall be a bit more platonic and live in my intellectual side. Here's to a productive day

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