Dear Diary,

It's 3am on Christmas Eve. I can barely tell to be honest.

I am off for 9 days. I'm on day 3. It's gone by ever so quickly.

I've started watching Killing Eve. It's really interesting. It's not unlike my job at the Sentinel. Boring, but the other guys have all the action. I'm catching up on logging all the past events of the week into my calendar.

Let's do an 'on this day'.

A day in 2013: I went to a local pub. I saw a band called The Tuts and Kate Nash was there. It was awesome. I anxious because there was a guy who didn't really understand social interactions and he was talking to the musicians on stage without understanding that he was not entitled to a response or that they would be interested in him. In fact it almost seemed like heckling. I did get annoyed at him and almost wanted to get him thrown out, but I realised that he's more likely learning disabled the more I saw him. It wouldn't be right.

5 years later. I'm at a party in The Sentinel. It's the bigun, the feature writers, fashion desk, my magazine and other sections are there. I have dinner with the grown up film and tv critics beforehand. What do they talk about: salacious rumours of the personal lives of their colleagues. Jesus wept. I grew up with some of these people on my computer, reading their critiques and so on.

The bizarreness of my life situation has not been lost on me, but I do not pause too much to think about it, as I have been so busy these past few weeks. I've had social event after social event. I've had a couple of family engagements and I've been through some career defining work. My life feels like something that my seriously depressed and previously suicidal self would have dreamt up, then woken up and cried about as his reality consisted of a brass bucket full of piss and a lamb shank that is under the bed, uneaten for a month.

I had to be that person to be the person that I am now.

Who am I now? I have a to do list to log all my activities of the past week. I then have to process them into my calendar, and then enter them into a weekly report. I am 10 weeks behind on my weekly report. Once I have completed the weekly report, I then do the monthly and annual 2018 document. I see and analyse patterns from said document as I have been compiling these records for a few years now. I then design the 2019 document.

This all began from me setting an album listening document back in 2006-2007. I set lists of albums that I listened to, a lot of heavy metal as it happened. I then expended the idea to create a system of organising my life. It grew, it grew to something that I used to get a hold of the confusion that is aspergers life. It's no longer 2006-2007 and I'm scouring people's facebook music interests to understand what they are into and simultaneously getting a grasp on the culture of the time. As it happens the culture is always changing.

It helps to work in a pop culture magazine, but I'm still making lists. So many lists that its' a full time occuptation to enter everything in.

So long as it makes me a functional and normal person in society. I'm using this system to orient my savings and work towards a mortgage. Maybe I can get a 300k property.