ABC Please:

A: Accumulate positive experiences - I did a big bike ride yesterday. 12 miles in total

B: Build mastery in activities that make you feel confident and not helpless. I did my best to do an hour of cardio a day. 

C: Cope ahead: I'm working on this. this takes quite a bit of work and planning and writing into my diary. I want to be better at this but it's difficult

P: Physical illness prevention. Maybe I need to deal with mental difficulties to help with this

L: Low vulnerabiblity to diseases: My knee and ankle are off. Do I have a day off from gym?

E: Exercise regularly: I did 6 days gym even on Friday when I had to go to a family funeral. I've ticked this box

A: Avoid mood altering drugs: I have eaten too much

S: Sleep healthy: I think I've been good at this

E: Eat healthy: I gained quite a bit of weight and bodyfat this week after an inexplicable dip. What I find confusing however is that ...my body appears different to how I see it. I think somethings' wrong. I have been the most active I've ever been and yet I haven't bowelled as much and I've actually gained weight and bodyfat. something seems wrong, very wrong. I have eaten a few kebabs too often though. I really like Berlin Strasse

 dear diary,

my bodyfat has reached a new low. 29.1% on sunday morning and 29.5% later on the evening. This is the lowest my BF has been on record. I feel like this marks a change in my body but I also feel inside like a different person. It feels good. A bit scary. I feel like as I change there's something I need to let go inside myself, of an old self. 

tuesday 21 Feb 2023 : ABC Please

 ABC PLease (I didn't get last week's done)

A: Accumulate positive experience. I supported my friends at a vigil

B: Build mastery in activities: I'm doing loads better with cycling and runing

C: Cope ahead: I could do better at this, I didn't get all my non prioity schema tasks done over the weekend

P: Physical illness prevention: My bodyfat has gone down

L: Low vulneratility to diseases : I managed my ankle issue by running at an incline

E: Exercise regularly: I did 6 days last week

A: Avoid mood altering drugs: My leisure substance of choice is fast food

S: Sleep healthy: I think so

E : Eat healthy: I have gained weight but lost bodyfat. I don't know what that means. I think its related to my increased running and metabolism.

 Sunday 19 Feb: Things I am happy about today (for Saturday 18)

• I met Naomi at the vigil yesterday (saturday). I have been worried about her for a long time and it was nice to meet her.
• I've been rethinking about how I organise my priorities and how I orient being physical around being in my head all the time. To put this another way I have set up specific targets over the week which I have achieved if I plan it gradually. I cycled 30 miles in the week and 50km but I've exceeded it. 
• This week as part of a way to deal with my ankle pain and gait issues, on the treadmill I increased the incline and increased the speed. I seriously sweat like a mofo and I hit some good heart rates. I'm thinking less about steps targets but keeping an hour and keeping a higher heart rate. I'm thinking about the heart points in fitbit and I'm hitting some new levels and hitting some new fitness. Much of this I hope will translate to a changes to my body.

Naomi said I looked good...I did feel good about that...

abc please: 09/02/2023

 written 0457

A: Accumulate positive experiences: I went to the cinema, I am being determined to cycle 5 miles a day as much as possible

B: Build mastery in activities that make oyu feel confident: I can do an hour almost every day on the treadmill, I'm committed ot keeping a higher heart rate

C: Cope ahead: I'm working on this, I am hoping to plan ahead on events and things

P: Physical illness prevention: keeping fit in concrete goals. I need to do better with eating tho

L: Low vulnerability to diseases - um, I had a blood sugar test

E: Exercise regularly: 5 a week is my goal. I did 3 sofar

A: Avoid mood altering drugs: i had some crisps

S: Sleep healthy - I think its okay

E : Eat healthy: I bought 2 boxes of reeces chocolate, maybe not the best at this

 Recently I have been fixated on mini targets. Small and achievable things. Some things that aren't so small but achievable and things I want to make routine behaviours. Things that I believe will create self discipline. 

This sounds vague, lets go into what those targets are. I'm trying to cycle 5 miles a day. I'm hoping to reach a net target of 30 miles a week on strava and 50km logged on pokemon go. I'm trying to run an hour a day. I used to do more but My ankle is quite weak at the moment, not so weak that I can't do a good run on 6mph for a full hour. I've gone from having 10500steps my goal to keeping a consistently high heart rate over the treadmill time. This does mean I'm reducing my goals for success but it also means I'm more laser focussed on what my achievable goals are.

 Today is Sunday 5 February, it's 6am. I've been up since midnight. 

I've just started watching The Last of Us (HBO Max). Everyone is talking about episode 3. It seems so dark I just don't feel up for watching apocalyptic fiction. The present day is hard enough. 

I bought some cigars just earlier. I smoked on Saturday; I haven't smoked since Christmas. I was servicing my bike. 

The Last of Us just feels too dark for words and totally like the darkness of the present day.

 abc please 01/02/2023

A - Accumulate positive experiences. I feel like work is diminishing my ability to get out, as is my time management

B - build mastery in activities that make you feel confident. I am getting ahead on some very important work, but at the cost of not getting my other targets done. Why is it always hard to keep a balance?

C - cope ahead. I think I'm working on this a bit today, I know that when I work hard on something in a single day I have to recover, usually 3 days to rest and then I'm more resilient, it is affected by having too many things to do at once. I was invited to a reception on Thursday but I think I won't go

P - physical illness prevention. I skipped gym but I also decided deliberately to rest my ankle, I need more time to rest my ankle as I've been running too hard on it.

L - low vulnerability to diseases: eating junk didn't help, but planning and being resilient making decisions that are not based on a template, maybe that helps.

E: Exercise regularly. Perhaps tomorrow I can still hit the 5 days a week target. 

A: Avoid mood altering drugs. Failed that one, biscuits, crisps and takeaway - twice today too

S: Sleep healthy - that's quite good at the moment and I am all on track to get things done to actually sleep early

E: Eat healthy (see above)