self expression

In some way this log is a vessel for expressing my inner feelings. Sometimes I find it so much easier to not speak my feelings, to find comfort in silence, to just stare at the wall, the ceiling, and just be consumed by the silence. I just want to be consumed by emptiness, to fade away into nothing; and turn into dust. Sometimes it is incredibly difficult to get up. To move.

Sometimes my limits change. More capacities at some times, none, at others.

right now I feel it a chore to type, to move, to get up, to talk, to even wank...