I’m going through IFS and thinking about creativity. I told Dr therapsit about that power metal song. There’s other songs that resonate with me. There’s other forms of creativity. I love looking at the moon, the sunsets. I think about the colours, the dark and the light. I look at the sky and sometimes I go to nearby rivers and ponds. I’m not near larger bodies of Water.

I think about the parts. The exile. The difficult feelings. The needs, the things I try to keep hidden because it’s so painful. When I run I put on some music and I lean right into those feelings. I imagine my parts. I embody them. I embrace them. I say things like ‘I love you’, ‘you are beautiful, ’, ‘my hero, ’

I am thinking about other kinds of creativity. I never talked about this in sessions with Dr Therapist but I make oil blends. This saturday night I made one 1 pt camphor, 2 pt sandalwood and 3 parts cedarwood. Those aren’t my favourite scents. But at that time those scents represented in combination things I want to work more on. They represent groundedness, they also as scents i feel match the nasty vinegar smell that comes out of me when I do 3 hours running. 

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