For a hermit, its not bad...

Dear Diary,

I'm feeling a little bit down in some ways. I've spent a bit of time in bed, laying in my thoughts, thinking about things. I've entered little worlds in my mind, memories, feelnigs of the past. Something seems to have unlocked my emotions since the interview on Tuesday. In wa way I've just wanted the days to pass bywithout acknowledging that I'm 25. I have lots to keep busy with: job applications, work, birthday presents, writing a talk and so on. I kind of want to avoid the media project now, it feels like bad karma on my soul. When I got up this morning I wanted to do a morning gym session, but I convinced myself to avoid it until I've finished all my tasks for the day.

 

As it happened, I have in fact finished all of my tasks for today and tomorrow. I have applied to 3 jobs and done a few job applications, yesterday and the day before I spent clearing tasks. It felt pretty long as I comprehensively went at lots of little tasks that I haven't attended to in a while, and I am almost ahead of things. I do need to prepare for a talk next week, and I also to control my eating, but I am now at a good pace. I suppose I can now legitimately go to the gym today. I got contacted on MSN by 'the ex', she was trying to initiate conversation with me. I didn't avoid her, but I made no effort to make conversation, so the conversation went something like this:

 

Her: Aloha <3

me: Hello

(5 mins later)

her: hello?

me: Hello

 

It's funny how there's so much psychology in instant messaging conversations, in addition it is also anxiety-inducing. I just ignored it and went on with things. In other news I have done the following this week:

• Constructed a new playlist
• Completed reading 2 books (proper books)
• Applied to 6 jobs this week (not including the 3 today, which would make 9)
• Trained 3 times (if I went later today it would make 4)
• Attended an interview
• Prepped for a talk I'm going to give
• Caught up with my reading GReader tasks, as well as little things like job searches

For a hermit, I think I'm doing pretty well for myself. I do not like being lonely, though.