Good morning, afternoon
I allowed myself to have a lazy day today. Considering that I've done about 18km for the past 3-4 gym sessions, and worked yesterday before crashing to sleep, oh and my near-leg cramp this morning; I think I need a rest day. I feel quite worn down this morning and I have felt a bit low today. not terribly low but low enough for it to matter. The tasks I've set myself look numerous and if I'm honest, scary. I'm always talking in counselling about how important the schedule is, but right now I feel like its the last thing I want to do. That's exactly why I'm pushing on. It looks like I've found enough to get on with.
I put on weight between yesterday and today, but that might just be poop weight that i've not released yet. measuring myself is unhelpful in that respect because I don't lose weight every day in that representative sense but it is a general downward trend. So long as I keep my calories low today I should be alright. My parents are going out this evening, so I shouldn't binge foolishly. I'm trying not to feed my self-loathing today. I'm also really low on funds. I'm thinking about raising money by doing online surveys, I must be desperate. Maybe I can sell my amazon voucher. Fuck.
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