Blushing (and other things that happened today)

Dear Diary,

The moment when I realised that the holiday is over is when I looked at my bank balance. Shit! I bought quite a lot of things lately, many of which are 'reasonable' expenses, primark trousers, a new pair of earphones, expenses for going out with mates. I don't think there will be any other legitimate expenses that I can make for the time being. I have a lot of job applications to do, and the financial situation is going to get worse before it gets better, since I am going to get >100 for my Febuary payment. Today I woke up late, however to compromise this, I managed to do a pretty intense session at the gym.

I managed to break about 3 records and get 5 different quest achievements on fitocracy, so I had to calculate quite specifically the workout that I wanted. Today I'm off to a family event, we have been preparing for the past hour or so. My friends have invited me out to central london to some club or other, apparently my friend has gotten a guest list name. This is an instance where I would respectfully decline. My friends have been going out virtually every night since new years eve, its ridiculous! Don't they have a job to get back to?? I guess what they do with their annual leave is their own business. With relation to myself, I can't afford, financially and in terms of my time, to go out so much. I'm going to turn them down but pretend I'm interested.Tomorrow I'm helping at the community garden, and then I'll see what I'll catch up with in the afternoon. I say it so often that it's a painful cliche, I need better skill with time management. Right now I'm just about managing.

As I get on with my schedule, I'll inform you what happens with them. Perhaps another thing I might note is that a girl I used to know from my support group is chatting to me a lot lately, we are sharing a lot intellectually. I need to be cautious not to have feelings for her. This girl is trying so hard to be Lou Salome, and she even said I am like Nietzsche. This seems like a highly distasteful analogue, in addition, I shouldn't try to be Nietzsche, because Paul Ree is just around the corner.

Anyway, Off I go.

Let's be positive: I feel really fit and I feel a sense of optimism and self determination which is unprecedented. My friend said that if I keep up this pace of physical activity for another 2 or so months, I'll be irresistable to women! I blushed at that point.